POETRY

Your poetry lacks

Your poetry lacks intelligence.

All this talk about copy cat

All this talk about copy cat this copy cat that makes no sense. Is she to remain completely untouched and uninfluenced by what she has read or been exposed to? Forough is unique in her expressions of the female point of view. No one expressed subjects like she did. So you cannot expect female poets not be touched by her work.
Bache poru: poetry is mostly about moaning anyway!

don't judge a poem by its geneology

i'm no authority on persian poetry, but i think this sounds and feels more like sohrab sepehri than forough.

but all that is really besides the point. of course anyone worth their clams will be influenced by sohrab, forough, shamloo, nima, moshiri, and all the rest.

the essential question for me is (after aesthetics, music, etc. of the poem)... the feeling and the message it conveys. and this poem has a lot of feeling, plus a few twists and curves to make it interesting.

great job and thanks for sharing.

listen to this song, nice poetry

in music ghashangey yeh valley khanandehash beh khoshgeley beh deh karan, sorry,

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=eo_Oequ5rgg

khoda fez aziz joon

Very original, indeed!

An original, perceptive and delightful poem. Thank you, Leila jaan.

nice job

u r cute.

به او بگویید دوستش دارم به او که تنش بوی گلهای سرخ را میدهد به او که با جادوی کلامش زیباترین لغات را شناختم به او که لحن صدایش دلپذیرترین آهنگ است به او که نگاهش به گرمییه آفتاب و لبانش به سرخیه شقایق ودلش به زلالییه باران است به او که برای من مینویسد مینویسد از باران، از شبنم، از گرمای عشق و به او بگویید دوستش دارم به او که قلبش به وسعت دریاییست که قایق کوچک دل من درآن غرق شده به او که مرا از این زمین خاکی به سرزمین نورو شعرو ترانه برد و چشمهایم به را به دنیایی پر از زیبایی باز کرد به او بگویید دوستش دارم به او که صدای پایش را میشنوم، به او که لحن کلامش را میشناسم به او که عمق نگاهش را میفهمم، به او بگویید دوستش دارم به او که گل همیشه بهارمن است به او که قشنگترین بهانه برای بودن من است و به او که عشق جاودانه من است

Moving and thoughtful, as usual.

Moving and thoughtful, as usual. Your poetry is one of the best among today's Iranian poets.

A little note about other comments:  I think Forough influenced any Iranian poet who was born after her. And I think she touched any Iranian (poet or not) with the beauty of her poetry. So it means there are Iranians with a certain characteristics; As soon as they feel moved by any poem, they would instantly remember Forough and her poetry.

So please don't worry about these comments and keep up the good job.

Azarin

You won't go far

You haven't come from anywhere according to your poem, you won't go anywhere far with copy style either.

No

I don't like it because it's not her or her life but the copy of what she thinks a poem should sound like.

Aref Jaan Manoucher Avaznia

Aref Jaan

Manoucher Avaznia wrote that peom about a year or so ago under the influence of Mowlavee. It is published in a book called "Sky In River" by Infinity Publishing company.

A poor copy job

I wished our wannabe poetsse would write something original and not a patchy copy of the forefathers (or foremothers in this case). Same boring moaning style over and over again. baba basse digeh

Who wrote this poem?

Manoucher, who wrote the poem?

Life is a journey- not a destination

بسیار زیبا بود

A Refined Piece

It is a wounderfully refind piece of work, but:

If within yourself, you do not shiver,
How are you going, to give me fever?
When well-squeezed, if we give drops,
How, at all, can we, cry a river?
If we have no light, I wonder how
In the pitch of night, we can glitter?
If you can't be moved, by force of a love,
By lovers' singing, how you quiver?
Between sweethearts, if stands no path,
How are they able, cross the river?
We have to receive, to the full content
Before naming selves, a true giver.
Every rock would soak, in pure water
Before giving birth, to a big river.
Every moon attains, beams of a big sun,
Before in the dusk, it can glitter.
Chehree if claims, to be in a love,
Like a moaning reed, he must quiver.
Chehree is poet's penman

Very nice

Very nice poem Leila khanum. Thank you

Definitely forugh

This is Definitely forugh, baa in haal mikhaamet

Beautiful

Beautiful, profound and meaningful.

Your poems remind me of

Your poems remind me of Forogh's. Thanks for sharing them with us!