Daadan vs Kardan

May be sex is perceived as a trade in our culture


Daadan vs Kardan
by Lili

I ask my fellow Iranian sisters, mothers, girl friends to stop saying “daadan” which implies trading an act of sex for something else. Why not just say love making? Or having sex? Or even "kardan"? Are we just natural born prostitutes?

Although I find the term used mostly by those grown up in Iran, it is gaining momentum here in the West in the Iranian communities abroad. May be it’s due to the influence of massively growing migration of Internet-assisted-newlywed Iranian women. Whatever it’s due of, I find it extremely offensive.

It may seem trivial to some, but to me it means an act of trade. Daadan bar vazneh gereftan.

At a recent all Iranian female gathering in Los Angeles, where the air was filled with hyper sexual conversations of weird and creepy nature, from laser hair removal and lifting both legs up and wide open to going through C-Section to preserve vajayjay and thus happy husbands, I couldn’t help but notice a particular conversation between 2 young (sort of newlywed) females from Iran. Their conversation was enlightening and depressing at the same time. Here are some excerpts where I refer to them as Zan A and Zan B:

Zan A: Va cheh laaghar o khoshgel shodie! Chee kar kardie be maa nemigie ha! Hatman behesh khoob midie, aareh?

Zan B: Manke nemidam, oon dost dareh model eh rapie mano bekoneh az posht…he he

Zan A: Khosh behaalet. Man bayad enghadr naazesho bekesham ke behem bedeh

Zan B: to be een khoshgelie! Hayf eh to nist?

Zan A: areh baabaa. Aslan doost nah daareh mano bekoneh. To een yek saal, shayad 3 baar taa haala mano kardeh oon ham hamash 2 daagigeh bood. Man zeshtam L

Zan B: nagoo in harfo. Khailie delesh bekhaad. Aslan boro baryeh khodet ye dost eh pesar paydah kon beh oon bedeh o haal kon. Injah Emrikaast!

Zan A: Raast migie akheh taa kay sabr konam, ha? Haala keh baayad pishesh bemoonam taa Citizen besham baryeh maamaanam o baabaam green card begeeram badesh mizanam dar koonesh miram…

The conversation with on and on into seriously graphic details, from barely legal porn to plastic surgery on vajayjay, which I’d rather not share. I found the whole conversation about rapie, daadan, mikoneh nakoneh, adultery, green card deals,… very depressing. However, it all made me think if the commonly used term of “daadan” is only the tip of the iceberg. It’s all about our perceptions of sex. May be sex is perceived as a trade in our culture even between man and wife, wife and boyfriend, and man and sigheh. May be we are expected to be natural born prostitutes, are we?


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Divaneh jan.

by comments on

It's smart of you asking people's opinion in advance.  You have to be prepared since it might happen in your fantasy. :)  Stop spoiling yourself.  You made me to think of all permutations even with no or a slim chance.  Lili could be a great help since she demonstrated her fantasizing power while listening to 2 ladies.  I am so proud of being an Iranian.

"It's not about what we believe. It's more about how we behave and influence." Comments


خانم جان شما فقط می خواهی ما را گیج کنی


بابا مگه شما کار بهتری نداری انجام بدی؟ ما همین طوریش هم معنی اشاره های خانمهای ایرانی را نمی فهمیم و نمی دانیم که دارند می کشند و یا هل می دهند. باز اگر منظورشان را بیان میکردند ملتفت می شدیم اما حالا به لطف شما اگر یک خانمی توی پارتی ایرانی ما را کشید به یک گوشه و گفت می خوام بکنمت، آدم دیگر نمی داند که با جلوی آدم کار دارد یا با عقب آدم.


Of course in Farsi.

by comments on

Of course, it was in Persian. English magazines have their own particular subjects. We can't advertise everything in every magazines.

I shouldn't hide that my son was practising his Farsi by reading the same magazine. If he read that ads, he would probably thought its our culture:)

Is it in our culture?  It won't be unusual.  Bazi vaghta oonghadr zol mizanim ke cheshamoon dar miad:)

"It's not about what we believe. It's more about how we behave and influence." Comments


The only exit is at the back door.

by comments on

The subject is a name of a book (seriosly), which is becoming popular these days.

The article reminded me that book, but just the title of the book.  I don't think that people use the word of "Dadan" anymore.  The person who f*ck says "Mikonament, mikonamet", and the other person says "Bokon, Bokon". We never say Dadam, Dadam.

In contrast to author's opinion, I think 2 ladies were fun loving people.  They could explain in words what they did.  I'd like to know how Lili explains her sex act.  Seriously, if one wants to explain, there will be no other ways.  My guess is that Lili still views sex as a sin.  She likes to talk about love, which is not "sex".  One makes love-making with someone who loves including sex.  Please don't be confused with the use word.  It gets more confusing if you think more.  For example, can we say I love oral and I love you too?  Next task is to worry about which one you love more.  Come on Lili.  Take off your clothing in front of a mirror and say all bad words you want to an imaginary person.  In English bad girls use "f**k" for Dadan and Kardan.  We do the same as I noted at the beggining.

"It's not about what we believe. It's more about how we behave and influence." Comments


Really , comment?

by Souri on

Are you serious? Was that ads in Persian or English?

I think I can get a Shahrvand newspaper here. It will be so funny to see that ads, LOL

Still, I can't believe it....




by comments on

I couldn't stop laughing.  What the hell is "vajayjay"?  When I read the article I thought I should have known by now!  I assumed that's a Hindi word for Iranian ladies who married in India.

My information is a bit better than you because I sometimes read Iranian magazines.  A few days ago there was a one page ads in an Irani magazine in Toronto (Shahrvand I guess).  It was about a laser doctor who beautifies vagina's shape.  The first line was "Do your husband tired of watching your vagina"?  Ahmaghhaye bishoor:) 

I am sure that's not a one-time ads, and it will more popular.

"It's not about what we believe. It's more about how we behave and influence." Comments


Bahmani- There IS a Farsi Word for it

by IranFirst on

Please see the following (from Dehkhoda's Loghatnameh)




No Farsi Word for F**K

by bahmani on

Now that I think about it, the singularly most effective guttural release in the English language is to scream the word F-U-C-K!!! as loudly as you want.

I seem to do it once a day, usually in the car, while slamming my hands on the steering wheel.

But absent this same equivalent effective release in Farsi, explains the immense pent up frustrations we as Iranians carry around with us.

No surprise that even on this healthiest of explorations, the writer cannot manage to say the word "Vagina". Nevermind the best word in the history of the world of words that could be used for headphones, Koss.

To read more bahmani posts visit: //brucebahmani.blogspot.com/


However, one should also consider

by ConnieBobroff on

However, one should also consider "aabestan" (take water) which, while also implying some "daad o setad" seems to reverse the customary roles of faa`el and maf`ul. (Sorry, could not resist!)


زن "گرفتن" شوهر "کردن"


The use of the verb "kardan" is very confusing in Persian. Here is another example, written as satire by the late "dAyi Hamid" who was one of the great contributers to this site, many years ago. YAdash GerAmi 




Tools Indeed! They are called blow up dolls!

by fanoos on

Bought a half a dozen of them for my brother Asghar!

The cheap Chinese brands deflate too easily when pressed against too hard!



I heard of a new tool

by Souri on

Which looks like a little plastic bag, made in China, for the sake of "virginity". It is even made legal for sale in Iran, by one of the ayatollahs.

Veiled Prophet of Khorasan

Is there a

by Veiled Prophet of Khorasan on


procedure for politicians to get their honor and decency back? I know there isn't one for Mullah; never had any.


Here we go again, some aggressive feminist...!

by fanoos on

Here we go again, some aggressive feminist here trying to modify the 3000-year old nomenclature of @&#$%DAN!

How about gaee@&%?

PS- To last poster, I think it means vajina and surgery to sow it back together to be virgin again!?


One question

by Souri on

I read your article. Thanks for posting.

I did not get the meaning of  " vajayjay"

What is this?

And also, what is the plastic surgery on Vajayjay?

Sorry, i am an old lady and don't live in LA, and also am not surrounded by many Persian ladies as friends.

Thank you.